Blah

yes i know i need to post on the trip to malaysia and a few ratemysteak goes global type posts…. but this is far more urgent

this afternoon i rcvd a call from lj hooker - i thought this was a little weird as i’m renting the apartment thru raine n horne, not lj hooker. turns out the asshole owners of this apartment who signed me up to a 6 month lease a mere 3 weeks ago have decided to sell it out from under me. now i understand circumstances change…. if i was 3 or 4 months into the lease i’d be pissed…. but i’d understand. but 3 weeks in? come on… you’re taking the piss… there is no way in hell these assholes didn’t know when they signed the lease a measly 3 weeks ago that they were gunna put the place up for sale. kie and lucy tang (the named owners on the lease)…. you can go fluck yourself with a nice origami crane.

raine n horne apparently rcvd a form10 (notice of intention to sell) last thursday - they have STILL not advised me of this. these asshats are way high on my shitlist. more on how to screw these fawkers later…. lj hooker issued me a form9 (notice of intention to bring prospective buyers through) today to bring a photographer in on wednesday to take photos.

a quick scan of rta.qld.gov.au tonight tells me i don’t have a legal leg to stand on…. so i have to rely on (perfectly legal) morals. these asshats wanna do an open house here this saturday morning - apparently i have no choice but to sit back and let them do this….. but there’s nothing that says i can’t have 100 drunken asshole mates here with me while it happens. apparently i’m legally obligated to keep the premises in a “neat and tidy state”…. so my plans of hanging vegemite crusted jocks from the light fittings are out. there’s no mention of foul smells though. yes fellow bloggers, you can take the boy outta ipswich, but you can’t take the ipswich outta the boy.

sure i could get angry to drop his guts in the apartment but the effect is too short lived…. calling for suggestions from you blog readers and random lurkers - how can i make this apartment stink so bad no-one will buy it (preferably easily reversible… after all, according to the rta i have to live here for another 5 months and 1 week).

jedi - we need to find a way to fit your harley in the lift…. i think harley burnouts on the balcony would be a nice touch.

blog readers and random lurkers - keep yourself available for this saturday morning….. i don’t want you here unless you haven’t showered since friday morning (preferably eariler)…. bring your ugly, stinky game. but be ready for a long and protracted battle - there could be many open houses between here and victory.

calling for all suggestions on how to make this place un-sellable (that’s not even a word but i’m so pissed i don’t even care)…. and come on - prawns behind the light switches, etc - it’s all been done. be creative…..

in the quest for furniture i visited ikea yesterday….. my first ever trip to an ikea - what a madhouse.

they must have undercover parking for 2000+ cars…. the layout is a marketing dream - once you walk in the door you can’t get out until you’ve gone thru their entire maze and looked at every damn product. despite having thousands of everything i still didnt find a single bloody thing that i wanted for the apartment.

i had the smarts to drag nads along so no-one mistook me for one of the 1000’s of raving homo’s in there gushing over different coloured pebbles and paper lampshades.

so after spending all day yesterday doing the rounds of 100 different “homemaker” stores i wind up back at the first bloody store i went to and i’ll be getting just about everything i need from freedom….

while i’m typing let me have a quick rant about channel ten…. notorious for completely shafting formula1 fans for years they now continue to eat cawk by delaying the motogp telecast…. big brother up-late is so much more important - ffs, somebody napalm that entire damn building and make it go away. by the time i see the race the next round will have started.

channel ten - you SUCK!

perth novotel - restaurant underneath called fineans or something…. it’s an irish bar and the first place i ever drank little creatures (about 6 years ago)

breakfast burger (they’re not open for breakfast… weird choice of name)

bacon, egg, cheese, bit of token tomato and stuff - only 12 bucks or something.

8/10…. good feed, no pretentious wanker food here…. prolly only deserved a 7 but the little creatures on tap bumps them to an 8.

perth ambassador hotel

fillet mignon with some mushy stuff around it….. maybe i’ve got the definition wrong but i always thought a fillet mignon was a steak with bacon wrapped around it. there was no bacon!!! the mushy stuff tasted like peppercorns. pretty shithouse feed all round really. AND they charged 27 bucks for it.

5/10…. over priced, under quality, product wasn’t as advertised.

getting 2-3 a day now from comment spamming asshats

wtf is the wordpress option to force commenters to type in the image text? or any other anti spam measure

tards